To Peter

I've had the most amazing week and a half, and I'm still here to talk about it. A whirlwind. An atomic blast. A tornado. And then a calm sea. Painfully, it took awhile for that calmness to show up.

I had a human experience that catapulted me into a black hole where I could do nothing more than surrender. It wasn't what happened to me that was so monumental; it was the craziness going through my head. Sweet jesus! How nuts could I make myself? So much so that I've had the runs for a week, and haven't eaten a full meal in that time either.

Something huge is headed my way. I can feel it. And I need to be made anew for the experience of it. I purged some very old, dry, unnecessary beliefs and flushed them down the toilet. What I know for sure right now is absolutely nothing. I awoke one morning feeling so fragile I thought I would break in two if someone looked at me funny, and then I got mad. I mean I got bursting at the seams mad because who I really am catapulted forth. I could see how huge and powerful I am, and how small I had been playing for so long. It was painful to be little and fragile and scared. It broke my heart open and love poured in.

I look at life with new vision now. I see the sacred in everything. I am in awe. I am grateful. I am so full of joy that it leaks out of my eyes.

I feel a change coming to me that is so big, so powerful, and so loving, that I had to grow to meet it. One of the things that came to me was words from a dear man on Facebook. I was crawling to the computer and using every spare ounce of energy I could muster to check the posts on my wall, when this showed up:

The primary purpose of everything created in my reality is only for it to be "experienced". The secondary purpose for any experience is the opportunity to learn a particular lesson that is unique to the experience "I" am having. It is MY experience and MY lesson...others have just agreed to play a part for us so we can "GET IT." When we don't "RESIST GETTING IT" we hold up the evolution of all participants.
--Peter Blake -- "The Drama Virus...how to remove the virus and love being human"

It was just an experience I had. That's all. The others were just playing their part so I could GET IT. How cool is that? How grateful am I for their participation? Finally, the breakthrough after the breakdown. Thank you, Peter. I breathed. And I still just breathe. Ah... and then there is peace. I'm reveling in it. I'm soaking it in, and this time I GOT IT. Really. I feel it deeply. There's still remnants of old thought patterns but they're fleeting (and fleeing). Mostly, I sit and marvel at my body's resilience, my spirit's insistence in showing up and being known, and my mind's flexibility. At least one layer of armor has dropped away.

So, to Peter, thank you for your words that I bathe in right now. Thank you for being that mirror that reflects back to me pure, divine love. Not only can I feel it, but I can touch it. In my most genuine way, I thank you for being there for me.

God in The Gratitude Cafe

I met God in The Gratitude Cafe on July 16th. He came through the French doors wearing a white linen shirt, blue jeans, and black boots. He held his sunglasses in his hand, and he had the most beautiful head of gray hair I've ever seen on a man. He swooped through the door, across the room, and right up to the counter where my daughter and I were sitting. He leaned toward us and said, "Please tell me that the transformation of this place has just happened in the last week or so."

My heart has not beat the same since.

I knew immediately he was from my planet. We spoke the same language. He proved it over and over with every word he spoke. He even admitted being from my planet. I knew he was God. He told me that yes, indeed he was. I knew he had to be because I'd just seen Jesus in an ad on Facebook about finding my soulmate for those of us over fifty. Jesus looked really good, but God stole my heart. Ah...

He stayed long enough for me to find out his real name is Steve and he's very knowledgeable about computers and was too young to go to Woodstock. He also grew up in a drug store because that was where his father worked. He went to a local high school. I don't remember which one, but he bowed to me when I told him I was a Lynch grad. I knew then he must really be God.

Just as suddenly as he had swept into RejuveNation LifeSpa, he just as quickly sped away to see Bonnie at Orison's on the square. I gave him my daughter's card and told him about our next event this coming Friday. He loved what I'd done to scratch out her old address. I told him that if he looked at his name in the mirror it'd spell dog. He barked.

So, is God the most handsome male version of Cinderella? At the stroke of some time on the clock he fled to a shop on the square because he had to, and I haven't seen him since. Unfortunately, he didn't even leave one of his black boots behind. There is no sign of his existence. No one I've talked to even knows who he is except one person, the owner of Mama Emilia's, and he told me that God is married to Cindy and they walk their black lab around the square all the time. God did not have on a wedding ring, and I've never seen him walk the square. Ever. And I've seen plenty of couples walk a black lab around the square, but I don't know if their names are Steve and Cindy. And if there really is a God who's name is Steve and he's married to Cindy and they walk their black lab around the square, all I have to say is that Cindy is damn lucky.