What a difference a day makes. Also, what a difference a phone call makes.
Coming out from the other side of the dark night of the soul has been refreshing and brand new, to say the least. It's as if the windshield wipers have not only cleaned the windshield so perfectly, but they're not needed anymore because the rain has gone. Everything smells fresh and clean and invigorating. Ah...the cleansing of the unnecessary. Nonessentials, James Arthur Ray calls them. It's interesting because I didn't know that what I was purging was still lingering from a marriage.
I listened to Bruce Lipton's radio interview last night and he talked about the subconconscious (or unconscious, as James calls it) being the one living out the old patterns unbeknownst to our conscious minds. Lovely, really. No wonder relationships of any kind are so interesting. We're acting on habits from our unconscious and totally unaware consciously, and amazed when those around us respond to those unconscious behaviour patterns that we display. Sound confusing? Listen to Bruce Lipton. Apparently, he's also on lots of YouTube videos. I plan on taking a longer look at this guy's theories. He's coming out with a new book this fall called Spontaneous Evolution. Can't wait. This really isn't anything James hasn't taught, but it was interesting to hear someone else's take on it. It was a great refresher course.
What I'm discovering as I emerge from this tunnel I dropped myself into is that the universe provides for me all the right people and circumstances at the right time every time. It has been my inability to let go and truly trust that I'm so provided for in every way. I feel my hands being clenched, hanging on for dear life. And it's when I let go (usually from being too tired from holding so tightly), that the miracles surface.
Here's craziness factor number 2,567,985. This one took me so far down the tunnel I couldn't see light if I tried. Why? Because I didn't trust. I didn't let go. And for the life of me, I didn't know I was taken care of. But, I'm going to tell you anyway.
This amazing man that I call Sam from Seattle, told me last Friday afternoon to call him when I got home so that we could work on my computer together. Right? Simple?
So, I did.
He didn't call me back until Sunday evening. In the meantime, I plummeted down this tunnel with numerous thoughts of "he doesn't want me in his life" to "something's happened to him" to so much more stupidity. Sunday evening he calls me to let me know that he never received my message until just then. He called me right away to let me know, so in the meantime I'm thinking he wants time away from me, and...oh god, it's too stupid to continue. I feel like I was still in high school. Those crazy unconscious behavior patterns echoed through the tunnel with ease. What the hell? How old am I? How evolved am I? Put me in a relationship with a man that I'm in love with and out goes all the enlightenment I've ever progressed towards. Is this what James means by a quantum leap? I doubt it. I think he's talking about leaping forward not plummeting backwards into the depths of despair.
That was also an old behavior pattern from the ex too. So, with "Sam" I'm learning what has still been lingering that I no longer want. What a great lesson. What an amazing journey we're taking together. I am so grateful.
Now, it's a new month, a new day, a new beginning. Time to move forward into the things I truly do want in my life. "Sam" told me to get a vision board and put my intentions on it. What a great way to begin again. It's time now for me to focus on what I really do desire in my life. The latest layer of muck has been washed off and now it's time to restart my engines and enjoy the new ride.
To all those who have come into my life lately and been there for me, thank you, thank you, thank you!!
Susan, I'll be thinking about you while you heal that arm, girlfriend! Thank you for your kind words and your tender love. I appreciate it more than you know.
Bee Herz (psychic medium from Steamboat Springs), my dear, wonderful friend, thank you for being there for me. It was so great to talk with you and to just spread the love with you. Let's not wait so long to do it again.
Myles, what a beautiful light you are in my life. I look forward to traveling the world with you sometime. Australia is definitely going to be on my vision board. In the meantime, I love sharing life stories with you.
Cynthia, ahh... You are a breath of fresh air to me. You are a beautiful mirror to me. This journey we're on is so much more fun with you beside me. I am so grateful.
And to Sam from Seattle, there are no words. You know how I feel. My cup runneth over...