Sunday, January 19, 2014

letting the new book begin

Astounding revelation yesterday!

Several years ago I wrote a novel that became my life. The main character, Grace, was married to a man who she worked with, and she despised her work. That part of the novel was true for me at the time I was writing it, but the rest of the novel came into being as the years progressed. Grace left her husband, as did I. She became a fabric artist, as did I. She worked with another fabric artist, as did I. When I began working with my fabric artist partner I thought the novel had come to a conclusion as far as mirroring my own life, but that all changed last year. In the novel Grace and her partner go separate ways, and the end of the novel concludes with her befriending her husband again. Not that they get back together, but that they are able to care for one another as two beings who at one time were in love with each other.

It wasn't until yesterday that the rest of the novel came to my mind. I realized that my relationship with my fabric artist partner had come to an end which parallels my life and my character's. Then, more importantly I realized the very last piece of the storyline -- Grace became friends with her husband. Last September the same occurred to me. I became friends with my ex-husband. What an amazing gift that was. I can think of him with great love in my heart, and that has lifted such a burden from me. I see how beautifully everything was orchestrated, and I feel blessed beyond words. He, his wife, my daughter, and I created a new family dynamics that I thoroughly enjoy thinking about. Truly an amazing gift.

So, with that realization came something else so extraordinary. When I realized that everything in the novel had been played out in my real life, I now am beginning anew. Clean slate. Empty page. Blank canvas. I understood with such clarity what it is for me now to start over with no baggage, no burdens, nothing. It's all brand new now. I step forward into the unknown now to let the new book begin!

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